Emma Watson has said in the past that her breakup from rugby star Matt Janney was “horrendous” and now we may know why.

It turns out Watson was extremely uncomfortable with being single after her December 2014 split, so she decided to stay silent about it—literally.

"I felt really uncomfortable," she told Vogue U.K. "Even before my relationship ended, I went on a silent retreat, because I really wanted to figure out how to be at home with myself."

On the retreat, the mag explains, Watson stayed at a private facility in Canada in the Rocky Mountains, and she was required to not speak for a week.

She said overall, however, she’s had good dating experience with men that make her feel cherished.

"I certainly haven't found that with doing all that I do or being all that I am, that I've struggled in my love life," she said.

One of the things that keeps Watson busy is her role as a Goodwill Ambassador for UN Women

"Everything clicked in to place, in a way that it hadn't before,” she said of taking on the activist role. “I understood what I'm here to do and knew where to channel all this energy that has been coming at me. I now feel this sense of peace. People say that I'm different since I did it."