Rolls-Royce introduced its newest car, the Dawn, this morning. To tell us about the “sexiest Rolls-Royce ever built,” the luxury automaker published one of the more remarkable press releases we’ve seen. At 4,800 words, it’s a true longread, one packed with phrases like “The early-day chill of dawn provides an erotic tingle on the skin, awakening the senses and passions as the day begins.”

It’s too bad it’s so long, because it delivers a lot of good information. That is, if you know what you’re looking for, and are up to date on your car design lingo and Napoleonic knowledge. In case you’re not, we went ahead and annotated the whole thing for your edification.